We exist to support survivors but it’s important, especially at this time of the year, that others can be there for survivors too. Here’s some information that could help you support a loved one during this time.

For some survivors the festive period can be challenging. There are many reasons why this could be the case, from the increase of triggers, being reminded of a difficult time, seeing perpetrators, feeling lonely, or many other reasons. It’s especially difficult to feel this way when it’s meant to be the ‘happiest season of all.’ So what can you do if you want to support someone who is struggling this Christmas?

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    • Reach out and ask – Many people may find it hard to ask for support, especially at this time of year. So reach out and ask how they are feeling and be prepared that the answer might not be what you expect. The festive period can bring up lots of emotions you may not expect.
    • Listen to them – Don’t assume what may be easy or difficult. It’s important you really hear them, what they want and, if appropriate, how you can help. It’s not for you to decide what is best for them.
    • Encourage them to make plans and boundaries that put their self-care first – Sometimes it’s hard for people to put themselves first. It’s okay for survivors to say no, make space for themselves and make plans to reduce harm. Many people can feel like a ‘burden’ for needing to plan around Christmas. Whether that plan is about increasing safety or feeling less lonely, assure them they are not a burden and encourage them to do what’s best for them.
    • Don’t make them feel guilty for the choices that keep them safe – Of course we want our loved ones to be happy and join in with the fun, be part of the group and connect with family and friends but this might not always be the best option for someone. It’s okay if you feel a bit sad that they might ask for time away for example, or oppositely, you might feel surprised that might need you to specifically check in more around this time.  It’s important you don’t make them feel guilt for putting their wellbeing first and support where you can appropriately.

Here at SARSVL we are wishing for the type of festive break that you need, whatever that may be for you.